| Corny Joke Warning 16:56 - Aug 29 with 1140854 views | Boston |
What vehicle do electricians prefer to drive?
A Volts Wagon. |  |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 01:48 - Jan 6 with 1950 views | Boston |
Polish mate of mines a roadie for a rock band.
I have a Czech one too
Czech one too, Czech one too. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 17:55 - Jan 6 with 1732 views | loftboy |
Brian had been in Police work for 35 years.
Finally sick of the stress, he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in the hills in Tasmania as far from humanity as possible.
He sees the postman couple times a week and gets groceries once a fortnight, Otherwise it's total peace and quiet.
After six months or so of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his door. He opens it and a huge, bearded man is standing there.
'Name's Cliff, your neighbour from ten miles up the road. Having a party Friday night. Thought you might like to come at about 5:00...'
‘Great', says Tom, 'after six months out here I'm ready to meet some local folks Thank you.'
As Cliff is leaving, he stops. 'Gotta warn you, be some drinking'.'
‘Not a problem' says Tom. 'After 25 years in the business, I can drink with the best of 'em'.
Again, the big man starts to leave and stops.
'More 'n' likely gonna be some fighting' too.'
‘Well, I get along with people, I'll be all right! .
I'll be there. Thanks again.'
‘More'n likely be some wild sex, too,'
‘Now that's really not a problem' says Tom, warming to the idea. 'I've been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there.. By the way, what should I wear?'
‘Don't much matter. Just gonna be the two of us'..... 😉 |  |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 00:22 - Jan 9 with 1526 views | Boston |
There's no denying that women eventually turn into good drivers.
So, if you're a good driver, keep an eye out for turning women. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 21:31 - Jan 12 with 1223 views | Dorse |
My wife said I was average in bed.
I thought that's just mean. |  |
| 'What do we want? We don't know! When do we want it? Now!' |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 01:56 - Jan 13 with 1101 views | Boston |
| Corny Joke Warning on 21:31 - Jan 12 by Dorse |
My wife said I was average in bed.
I thought that's just mean. |
I'm not going to lie
My bed is broken. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 19:49 - Jan 14 with 912 views | hantssi |
I ended up with an older woman at a club last night.
She looked OK for a 61 year-old.
In fact, she wasn't too bad at all, and I found myself thinking that she probably had a really hot daughter.
We drank a bit, and had a bit of a snuggle, and then she asked if I'd ever had a Sportsman's Double..?
'What's that..?' I asked.
'It's a mother and daughter threesome,' she said.
I said, 'No,' - really excitedly.
We drank a bit more, then she says that tonight was 'My Lucky Night',.
So I went back to her place.
She put on the hall light and shouted upstairs: 'Mum, you still awake"..? | | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 20:42 - Jan 14 with 857 views | izlingtonhoop |
| Corny Joke Warning on 21:31 - Jan 12 by Dorse |
My wife said I was average in bed.
I thought that's just mean. |
We are the modes! |  | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 15:50 - Jan 15 with 733 views | Lblock |
I need to give a huge shout out and thanks to my neighbour who came to the rescue in this constant bloody rain and allowed me to borrow her big blue sheet of plastic covering.
So...
Ta Pauline!!! |  |
| Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 16:56 - Jan 15 with 680 views | Boston |
My mate got nicked for running a lamp stealing ring.
Fortunately, he got a light sentence. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 16:56 - Jan 15 with 680 views | loftboy |
What do you call an Alligator in a sleeveless top?
An in-vest-igator | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 18:41 - Jan 18 with 411 views | Boston |
Copper stops a bloke for careless driving.
Notices from the pic on the license that he's not wearing his glasses.
Look sir, I'm afraid I'm going to have to write you up for that.
But officer, I have contacts.
Don't care who you know squire; you're still getting a ticket. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 13:50 - Jan 23 with 110 views | Lblock |
| Corny Joke Warning on 18:41 - Jan 18 by Boston |
Copper stops a bloke for careless driving.
Notices from the pic on the license that he's not wearing his glasses.
Look sir, I'm afraid I'm going to have to write you up for that.
But officer, I have contacts.
Don't care who you know squire; you're still getting a ticket. |
Reminds me of this weird dream I have.....
I'm in my car constantly going round a roundabout holding the steering wheel with my right hand, in my left hand I have a frying pan and I'm making pancakes.
Spend the whole night tossing and turning... | |
| Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal |
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